Captain Caveman is back!

Yeap...

The long awaited blog from Mr Chan is finally here.
Sorry for the long pause as i was in the stage of hibernation..yeah...hibernating in the "Cave"
But I'm back now! coz the wall in my cave has ran out of space for me to draw and have use the last papyrus to clean my ass..

OK..how do i start?
Maybe i'll start by explaining why the ever consistant blogger - that's me.. did not blog for so long...yea yea...to my dear housemates, this explanation might just be another "excuse" for you and its not something new as i have explain to you dozens of thousands of lightyears time but what the heck...just wanna put it in "black and white"..so here goes..

*ahem*..

i was busy...

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Really..
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As mentioned in Je and Juls blog, i was going through a career changing path and process. That is why i have got no time to blog and because of this, i was punished.

First, i was branded with the name of "The Fake Juls" by my dear housemates coz i was not blogging - just like Juls before me and Juls on the other hand was branded "The Fake Mr Chan" for putting up a 4 lines of sentences which she calls "a blog" and this has been going for months..the penalty was heavy as i was constantly teased, threathen and receiving information from MNG and Zara on their "Sales" and "Promotion" on their summer/winter/autumn/spring releases of dress, skirts, bla bla bla..- which i do not subscribe for..

And now...i'm known as the "caveman".

After the long and numerous times of explanation, my fellow housemates finally understands my situation and has accepted the reason of me not being able to blog for a short period of time - until i settle down on my new job. And so, i promise them that i will blog as soon as i have settled down.

Finally, i have all the things i need in my new work place - a new computer, a new spacious cubicle (*ahem...manager marrr...*), stationaries, chairs, drawers, phone, bla bla bla..

With all things in place, still, i cannot start work as my machine is not setup yet - emails, bla bla bla..

Finally, it is done and the first thing i wanted to do was to check my personal mail and of course, check out the blog!..

As i click on the IE (Internet Explorer) and type "www.gmail.com"...waited for 5 minutes and nothing was loaded and suddently an error " Page Not Found ". What the fuck is going on here?..Further checks and clarification only to realise that i do not have access to the internet.

WHAT THE FUCK?...NO INTERNET?..TIU LORRRRR....HOW TO SURVIVE?

It's the bank's IT security policy. If i want to have an internet connection, i have to apply and justify why i need one. Besides that, the internet connection is only for 3 hours daily and it will be monitored by some so called "internet police". What a load of crap! Fuck it lar...no internet no internet lar...

And i told the above TRUTH to my housemates...again...they laugh and shouted at me "EXCUSES!!!.."
AND because of this unavailability of internet connection, it means that there's no more BLOG, no more MSN gossips and bonding, no more ESPN, no more PORNS, no more DOWNLOADS, no more EVERYTHING!! - during office hours..

AND because of all the above..i was re-vamp from the old brand of "The Fake Juls" to now.."The Caveman". Reason being that since i'm working in a bank and DO NOT have INTERNET CONENCTION, it's just like living in the stone-age, where i have to leave my messages on the wall in my "Cave" and so..the "caveman" was born. Again, i was teased, humiliated, threaten and harrased by my housemates. They even influence my girlfriend!!!...

This is a SMS message from Clarissa to me:

clair: Me in MyDin now checkin out the place. Do u need anything? Like a chalk to draw on the wall in your cave? Check your supply and let me know if u need more chalks.

GODDAMMMIT!!...
Of coz..i did not bother to reply.

My new job in the bank means..waking up early in the morning, driving to KL, the jams..new colleagues..new lunch partners..new affair with the tea lady..new politicians - who contributes to office politics..the parking fees...the "going-home-late-and-cold-food"..bla bla...u know the rest..

Since i've chosen to work in KL again, i guess its kinda like a "payback" to Je for all the criticism i've given to her when i was working in Shah Alam.

(me = in shah alam, Je=Damansara)

Me: awwwww...you're so lucky Je..me so jealous..
Je: why and of what..
Me: lucky you to have the oppurtunity to stuck in the jam...reach home late at night just in time to see your parents off the lights to sleep..the cold food on the table that awaits you..
Je: ....
Je: ...
Me: awwwwww...
Je: dun rub it in...

OR

*tuut...tuut...*
Je: hello..
Me: eh..where you at? driving?
Je: at office lar..
Me: awwwwwww.....you're so lucky..can stuck in the..
Je: dun rub it in..WHAT YOU WANT..

BUT NOW??...i got calls from Je and..

(me=KL, Je=Damansara)

Je: eh..still in opis (office)?
Me: i know where you're going Je..dun start with me..
Je: ....
Je: ....
Me: so..waasss...
Je: awwwwwwww......the jams...the cold dinner...i envy you lar..
Me: .............sssuuuppp...
Me: .....
Me: ...
Je: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA...COLD FOOD LOVIN FREAK!
Je: * click... tuut..tuut...tuut..tuut..*
Me: ...
Me: ...
Me: GODDAMMMITT..!!!

you see, i use to work so near that it takes me only 10 mins of driving to get to my office..

My working hours.
8.30 am : office hour starts
5.30 pm: pack it up..chow!

My routine:
8.00: wake up
8.15: starting the engine of my car
8.25: breakfast
8.40: in the office - yea..10 mins late but my boss don't really care..
9.00: still gossip-ing in the office - news being covered are as follows:

a) if there's football on the day before, then you will see "Ferguson", "Arsene", "Benitez", "Rijkaard" trashing out on "mourhino" and each other. Debates over the transfer market, player's performance and future matches predictions.

b) who got married and who got laid

c) who got a new watch in the office and who's gonna buy a greater watch the next day

d) bla bla bla..

10.30: download emails and chat on MSN for more gossips with fellow Je and Juls
10.31-12.00: replying emails and more gossips - Bitch about Juls with Je...(oopss...juls...you did not read this..you did not read thisssssss...you're a camel..you're a camellllllllll...........)

12.00-1.00: lunch
1.00-3.00: check personal emails
3.00-4.00: check on soccer news on soccernet.com, livescore.com
4.00-4.30: check on the latest gadgets
4.30-5.30: check on / update blogs.
5.30: Home..warm food..still have time to walk the dog..

(All the above = HEAVEN.)

But now in this new job...

5.50 am: alarm rings
6.15 am: wake up - officially
6.35 am: off to work
7.15 am: reach office
7.20-8.15 am: breakfast and newspaper
8.45 am: start work
8.45-12.30 pm: work work and work
12.30 - 1.30 pm: lunch
1.30 - 5.45: work work and work - of coz, in between, there's SMS-es from friends like Je, who sent me - hey caveman, there's an art exhibition in KLCC. you might wanna check it out and book your space there. Let me know. I can arrange. U COLD FOOD LOVIN FREAKO!

5.45 - 6.30 pm: pretend to work - actually just wasting time and waiting for the jams to ease.
7.00 pm: leave ofice
8.00 pm reach home and this is consider early!..

(All the above on the new job = sigh..)

sigh..
what goes around comes around..its true..!!

Now that Juls have also left us to Beijing to expand her "Mamasan" business and me not being able to be online on MSN, Je is left all alone with no one to chat with on MSN besides CAMEL but Je said that she rather talk to the keyboard than to chat with that CAMEL.!..hahaha...

Sigh, i wonder how Juls is doing now in Beijing?. Our yam cha session is not the same anymore with you Juls...
Awwwwwww......but dun worry
We'll get used to your absent in a few more yam cha sessions..

So Juls, how's life in Beijing eh?
Have you mastered the skill of spitting and squating?

please update us on your "happenings" - let it be sexual or work on the blog ok?

Till next blog..

This is caveman chan signing out - "we miss you ah ju ju.."

B . O . R . E . D .

Well, Juls has finally arrived safely in Beijing. Enjoying every bit of her life at this current moment - shopping, eating, getting to know places, learning the language and lifestlye. Good and new happenings are always welcomed. She managed to find her favourite food of all time, bread at this Singaporean bread store called, Bread Talk. Yum yum. The smell of fresh bread is actually filling my nostrils as I type this and best of all... they actually serve real BACON & HAM sandwiches and bread. That's bout the only babi I enjoy eating. Speaking of food... I'm super duper hungry now. Dang!

Mr. Chan a.k.a. the caveman on the other hand is enjoying his stone age life. He's gotten imuned to the fact that Internet connection or rather msn-ing at work is a BIG no no. If he does, he's putting himself in danger and the Internet police might just put him away for good. Poor guy. But.. I guess this is part of life. You gain some, you lose some. Mr. Chan is definitely gaining more experience from his current job but at the same time, he has to compromise his msn, sleep as well as warm food.

Recently there was an opening for art exhibition at KLCC. Told Mr. Chan to book a space. Unfortunately, he's too stoned-age to even bother bout the ever growing world of technology, where drawings can be framed up and displayed for all to see. He rather spent the afternoon drawing and leaving messages on the walls of his little cave for amusement. Not sure if anyone else actually goes there to see those drawings and messages.

As for me, I'm bored to death. First week of Juls depature has caused too much suffering. Aww... Juls you mean so much. The fact that I now have to declare myself to be the bestest friend to camel brings too much anguish and pain. My msn nick for the past one week or so had always been "Joules Out", "Joules @ BJ" and "Caveman loves drawing pictures on the walls"... These sorta nicks can only be understood by a few of us but it made camel initiated a conversation with me. Afraid that I might step on her toes again like the last time, although not literally (but would be nice :p), I chose to ignore her querries as no one is online now to come to my rescue if I offended her. Plus, I was not in the mood to explain some of these changes to her and I cannot possibly inform her that she can read about these changes here. So a week of silence for me.

Other than seeking attention from camel, I practically have to amuse myself by talking to myself (NOT), play computer games (YES) and chatting with some people who are too busy to even bother bout me. I surely do not gain anything from these changes. Work has not been too busy lately which makes matter worse coz I do not have anyone to kacau. :(

I'm looking forward to the day where all three housemates, I mean ex-housemates and now Mat Rempits could actually sit down again to chat away bout all the good times and silly moment of our lives.. Wah!! Drama habis!!

Till next time...

This is Mat Rempit #2 signing off - Left alone

Untuk Mat-Mat Rempit Sekalian

Ok la.. so we all neh blog very long d… we know, we know.. dun blame any one of us la.. we all very busy people mah.. Sumore nowadays a lot has changed, u know.

Speaking 'bout change.. let’s get an update on what has actually changed.

Ok..

Mr. Chan, changed job.. (u say .. “Yeah so what? Change job oni mah.. very big change meh?) Well, the big change is not the job.. the big change is the one that came WITH the job. Lemme explain… *ahem* Because Mr. Chan is now in the banking industry, his company does not allow him to come online no more.. sum stupid rule about security, pornography, chatting and internet police la. Anyhow, because he’s not allowed to come online no more, it means he can’t chat no more. So yeah, Mr. Chan now lives in the Stoneage where he draws cows and buffaloes on cave walls for self- amusement during work hours. Sounds so advanced hor?

Thus leading to the next change… Je is lonely. Yes, the poor girl is so lonely, since Mr. Chan is no longer online to amuse her, she also has to amuse herself. And how does she do that? By talking to her bestest friend in the world.. Camel. What would they talk about then? Well, their topics range from the Gobi Desert to the Sahara to the Middle East and back again. Honestly, I don’t know what they talk about la, simply because I also have not been online.. which then leads me to the last and biggest change of all.

I’m going to Beijing. Yes, by the time this post gets discovered, I would already have flown off (wah.. damn drama, like suicide note like that). I am going to start a new life and a new job. It’s all in all scary, exciting, daunting and intriguing. I really have no words to describe how I feel about going.. cuz I really dun know.. Haha.. when Je asked me how I feel, I told her, I feel like I’m going on a holiday. That’s all.. no pressure, no stress, just going on a holiday.. Mr. Chan says that it hasn’t sunk in yet, wait till I wake up one morning 2 weeks from now, oni THEN I’ll realize what I have done, and where I have gone. Haha… well when that happens, you guys will receive tones of sms-es from me la.. telling u that I miss u loads and shit like that.

So, yeah la, this Idiot from the Usual Gang of Idiots is going to be posted in Beijing and soon you’ll hear what this Idiot did in Beijing la. For sure got funny story one, since this Idiot dun know how to ‘jiang hwa yu’.

Oh.. one more big change for the 4 of us (including the aged EJ) we’re now no longer EX-housemates…

Kita s’krang dah jadi Mat Rempit! Which brings me to my last words here in Malaysia…

Yo member! Continue to rempit the good race! Ingat krome motor tu biar beling-beling (bling-bling) yer! Beling sampai aku kat Beijing pun nampak! (Mat) Rock on! Remmm… remm…. Reeeeeeemmmm.. Piiiiiiitt!

Till then, this is Mat Rempit #1 signing off. Peace!